Probably only the lazy have not spoken out about how terrible gadgets are and how addictive they are. There are tons of tips on how to avoid addiction, as well as how to set and control the time children spend in front of the screen... Lots of examples of children throwing tantrums and not being able to tear themselves away from the screen... Family dramas and wars over gadgets...
Now the main question: why are we so drawn to gadgets that it is impossible to tear ourselves away from them? What is the reason for this behaviour?
I'll start with an example. Once upon a time, when I was just starting my practice as a Davis facilitator, a very wonderful mother came to me with her child and said that school was a big problem for her child. That he came home very tired and overloaded. And then he takes his iPad and starts to stare at it for hours... If you try to take the iPad away from him or limit his time, he becomes violent to the point of aggression and completely inadequate... But if you let him play as much as he wants, then at some point (usually after 3-4 hours of sitting in it) he finishes himself and finally begins to "come to life". That is, he looks more rested and begins to behave more adequately, eats, shares impressions, etc.
"Wow" - I thought at that moment. - "Wow, how can this happen?" And since then, I, though not entirely consciously, probably, began to "collect" information about gadgets and their use in children with dyslexia, ADHD and autism. Children come to me very different, parents sometimes use completely opposite methods of education from "prohibit everything, leave useful" to "let him choose everything in his life himself".
And here are the thoughts that came to my mind: I will say right away that there is no right or wrong method of upbringing, everything depends on... the specific child. The children who had already shown some abilities or talents at the time of contacting me, "unloaded" through their favorite sports or some other favorite activities: music, art, handicrafts. And they had no dependence on gadgets at all, no matter whether they were limited or not. But there were other children who did not have pronounced sports or other talents. And here there were options: the children who were allowed to use gadgets were calmer, and in general, more adequate. In gadgets, they not only "sat" for hours, but also developed their narrow interests: they studied types of airplanes, learned geography and flags of the world's states, studied history and biology, older children were interested in programming and learning foreign languages, which brought them unloading and peace. Children who did not show (or better to say, who had not yet found) their calling and were limited in gadgets, looked more exhausted, touchy, tired, not quite, to put it mildly, adequate, and here real family dramas occurred, up to "philosophical" questions to parents "Is life worth living and suffering like this?", "Why did you give birth to me?"...
Addiction to gadgets does not arise out of nowhere. Let's think about the REASON for this addiction. It's simple, you say, in gadgets the child finds an easy way to get pleasure, watching pleasant content causes the production of the hormone of joy and the body demands continued high. That's right. But for people who are not addicted, gadgets are just ONE way to get pleasure, and there is no problem switching to another. For people with neuro-special needs, this is often the only way to get pleasure and the opportunity to relax at least a little!
Let's use an example again: a child with dyslexia at school. He often does not understand instructions and explanations, he cannot read or write. Being at school in such a state is, at the very least, boring. Against the background of successful students, problems with self-esteem arise. You have to pretend that you understand and dodge so that no one notices that this is not so. Fear of exposure and anxiety arise. At home: again, fruitless repetition of the material, upset parents, and all the same incomprehensible explanations. The same feelings: bored, you feel not very smart, anxious. But in gadgets you can be yourself: not bored, no fear of exposure, you can be confident in yourself and in what you do - one pleasure!
A child with ADHD at school: difficulties maintaining attention, restraining your restlessness, trying not to go beyond the school rules. And at home it is the same, only home rules. And in gadgets: the form of content delivery - video - does not cause problems with attention, sitting in front of the screen is quite comfortable and there is no restlessness, which means there is no need to restrain yourself. And there are no rules in choosing video content - everything is just the way you want!
A child with autism at school: lots of people, each with their own energy, loud sounds, shouting, noise, bright lights, flickering, emotions, ridiculous and incomprehensible rules of communication, fear of making a mistake and being "not like everyone else", fear that everyone will find out that you are "different", and also what others will think of you, no opportunity to talk about a narrow interest... At home, a little less, but basically the same: mom is tired - I am anxious, they make me do the most ridiculous things, for example, brush my teeth, change clothes, do homework. All this is very mentally overwhelming. But gadgets - well, you already understood - mentally relieve: it is not boring, there is no anxiety, rules, you can relax, exhale and finally be yourself, without looking back at others.
And now imagine that in this situation the child is forbidden gadgets and deprived of the opportunity to relieve stress, or strictly limited in time! For example: you get very tired, fatigue accumulates day after day, but to relieve stress you have only half an hour a day... And the rest of the time you do only "useful" things... So it's not far to burnout and depression... Let me remind you that children who have a favorite sport or hobby have the opportunity to relieve school stress there.
Thus, summing up, we can conclude that there is a benefit from gadgets and not a small one, gadgets are sometimes almost a medicine.
The only question that remains open for parents: to find out why the child needs gadgets so much? What is happening in his childhood life that gadgets are the only way to get pleasure, and sometimes a way to survive mentally? What overloads the child? Isn't it time to reconsider the system of teaching/raising a child to, if possible, a more gentle one? Childhood, well, happens in life once...
And finally, if you have noticed an addiction to gadgets in your child or a beginning addiction, and at the same time you care about your child getting a good education - and also understand the reasons why your child is overloaded at school, then contact Davis facilitators to work with these reasons. Because the Davis method is about how to discover in yourself what interferes with learning and how to eliminate these reasons. Then gadgets will cease to be your child's only outlet. The addiction to them will disappear by itself, since it will not be fueled by overload. And your child's childhood will become a world where it is easy, calm and you can be yourself without being overloaded!
You can find more detailed information about the method of correcting dyslexia, ADHD (H) and other problems in learning and behavior in the books by Ronald Davis "The Gift of Dyslexia", "The Gift of Learning" and "Autism and the Seeds of Change: Achieving Full Participation in Life with the Davis Approach to Autism". — Abigail Marshall (author), Ronald Dell Davis (author).
Elena Nikulina, licensed Davis facilitator of DDAI (Davis Dyslexia Association International) in correction of dyslexia, dyscalculia, dysgraphia, dyspraxia, Attention Deficit Disorder with or without Hypo/Hyperactivity, and other problems in learning according to the author's method of Ronald Davis, Davis autism facilitator of RDAF (Ronald Davis Autism Foundation) for helping people with Autism Spectrum Disorder, director of the Dyslexia Correction and Support Centre, London, UK. www.fixdyslexia.com
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